Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize