craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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