he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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