It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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