Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Two words: blizzard sex
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
