my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
