You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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