They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize