my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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