How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
