Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
