Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
