u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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