so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
