but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
