:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize