I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
