Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Randomize
