You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
