"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
