The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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