I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
