I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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