It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
