They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
