I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize