this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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