I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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