Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
This house was built for laser tag.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
