after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
