it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Randomize
