I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
there is puke in my bra ... again
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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