In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
