I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
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