I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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