The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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