i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
