did you get engaged???
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize