so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
