theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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