Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
we're making bets on your personal life
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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