Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I'm really into asian looking animals
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
