you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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