he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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