If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
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