In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
