A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
