your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
