Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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