Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize