It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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