Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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